Showing posts from April, 2011

Things you find in creeks

Attack of the Sexy Teenage Vampires

Attack of the Sexy Teenage Vampires By Tom Lichtenberg "Grubby animals!" he said. "Just look at them, crawling all over the place like vermin. They disgust me." "Good they don't feel the same about you," she gave him a look. 'They would if they knew," he countered, but he knew it would never occur. To them he was only a boy, or else a young man, a little thing to notice, admire and want. The same with her. Together they'd been around long enough to sense, even to smell the meagerest whiffs of attraction. "The one in the suit," he said. "Is mine," she quickly offered up. This game they played. How fast they could know. Any man or any woman might be a target for the boy or else for the girl. It was important to know which, because in that knowledge lay the whole of the tactic. Plus, there were different methodologies of approach. Most were resistant to the simple and direct. You had to play games with these cre

The Atheist Shopping Network Presents (Cover Art)

my most elegant cover ever, for my least elegant title!

The Dragon City Trilogy - Cover Art

Dragon Town is in the wild (aka Feedbooks)

and is now available for free , as always. Book Three of the newly rechristened Dragon City Trilogy. Smashwords and Amazon to follow in their own sweet time

thoughts on what goes into a story

(if you were directed here from a russian porn site, sorry. i have no idea why. you may click your back button now) Writers who continually write find the events of their lives slipping into their stories like streams feed into a river. It's not so much that 'one thing leads to another' as that 'all things lead to each other.' The strands coming into every instant of anyone's life are far too complex to unweave, and every writer has to encounter that fact. Some go the way of the vast detailed saga, with boatloads of words and stabs at psychological insight. Others try different methods like stream of consciousness or radical variations. Still others sit back and just tell a story and leave all the myriad threads to themselves. There's no right way. (A constant critique of my own stories is that they're too short, wind up too quickly, and leave some things unexplained, but I have my own pace, I follow my mind. I don't try to do anything else). Tha

Dragon Town - Potential Cover Image

Capradero 2011 is coming to Pescadero May 7-15. Don't miss it!

Capradero is an annual art show out in the beautiful open spaces of downtown Pescadero, California, featuring the installation and performance works of some excellent artists (and others such as myself). Find out more at

Book Three of the Snapdragon Trilogy is now underway

Book Three: Dragon Town , picks up another 17 years later, as Freak City followed Snapdragon Alley by 17 years. Argus Kirkham, now 39, is once again dragged unwillingly into an inexplicable situation. Sapphire Karadjian returns to the story as an investigate journalist assigned to the mystery of a volcanic sinkhole which has swallowed an entire football stadium, and from which a very strange and nameless young girl has emerged, hair and clothes aflame, with a message for Argus.

Considering Argus Kirkham at 39

To conclude the Snapdragon trilogy. With some inspiration from the Up series of movies

The reviews are in: The critics were all thumbs down on Jimmyland

Flaming out at the Philadelphia Screenplay Festival 2011. At least they liked the concept, if not the execution! It could have been better, sure, but it was fun to write it. I've come across a lot of this lately - writers complaining about how much hard work it is to write. Hey, if you love to do it, don't complain. If you don't love to do it, don't do it.

A Bicycle Story (or, too much Mexico City Noir)

A Bicycle Story by Tom Lichtenberg Remind me to tell you how much I hated everyone and everything, except my bike. I loved that bike. I hated my wife but I loved the bike, and what was I doing with a wife, anyway? What was I? Seventeen? Who has a wife when they're seventeen, especially when she's something like twenty-six, an old lady, practically? She could've been my babysitter. Wait, she was. Oh God, I didn't mean to tell you that. Anyway, forget about it, okay? Act like you never heard it. And I hated her, right? So it's like it doesn't even count. It's not like I was taking people's mail and dumping it in the trash. Well, that's another story. I hated my neighbors, too, Tammy and Willy. With stupid names like that, what would you expect? If you thought that Willy'd be one of those fat balding slobs who always had a beer in his hand and talked of nothing but shooting things with his rusty old gun you'd be pretty close, and I'm su

Um Zumbi Na Noite (trans by Rafa Lombardino) Zombie Nights in Portuguese, coming soon

Zombie Nights, translated in Portuguese by Rafa Lombardino of Word Awareness, Inc , is coming soon watch this space for links!!!

My generation has millions of voices, thank you very much

Partial Story Theme Song

Sexy Teenage Vampires Theme Song what the heck

Simon Royle Interview - In the Lighthouse #2

This is the first of a series of interviews with "writers I like" ™ - calling it "In the Lighthouse" for no other reason than my love of Pigeon Point Lighthouse: Simon Royle is the author of TAG, a futuristic science fiction thriller concerned with a conspiracy to eliminate billions of "lesser" humans through a high-tech implanted ID chip. His vision of this not-so-distant future includes a virtual elimination of personal privacy, given up in exchange for the peace and security of a unified world nation. The political underpinnings of this kind of thing are not the main focus of the novel, as might be expected from such loaded terms (these are libertarian nightmare scenarios). Rather, the attention is focused on a hero and his companions, in a classic sci-fi style. TAG by Simon Royle Simon has established a place for himself in the burgeoning phenomena of "indie publishing", with an excellent website , featuring a comprehensive "ind

I Heart Sexy Teenage Vampires

more or less

And Thou Shalt Make Loops of Blue

A google alert informed me that my Ledman Pickup has joined the chorus of internet spam and/or piracy, that vortex into which all things online are inexorably pulled, but it was an additional pleasure to notice that it was accompanied by one of my favorite bits of the Bible , a little section where God, that eternal busybody, is fussily instructing people on the proper way to sew curtains.

7, 14, 21, 28, 35, 42 up

The missus and I been watching this movie series the past week or so - haven't gotten to 49up yet but thanks to the miracle of netflix we will soon. It's a sort of periodic soap opera about some random Britishers interviewed every seven years of their life. The filmmakers set out to show how class in England is a fixed determinant from which everyone's future flows. The rich kids with all the advantages were to follow through with complete success, while the poor would carry on their limited traditions and the middle class would flounder hopelessly in mediocrity, and for the most part, they were correct. Yet the world changed dramatically during this period, which happens to coincide almost exactly with my own lifetime (I'm one year behind these people). I'm not British and so I cannot comment too intelligently on their culture, but it seems that the leveling of the availability of material possessions has reduced the gap, in some ways, reduced the sense of what &qu

A Tale of Two Toms

one of these toms writes books that "slam the reader like a torpedo". the other does not. and who's to say that giving books away for free is undermining anyone's livelihood? my free ebooks seem to be useful in some way to these scammers at, who scrape my books and covers off of and put them on their own site as if they had permission

Free from Bibliotastic, Rays&Nights, my cross-genre shared character trilogy:

"Rays and Nights" features Zombie Nights, Death Ray Butterfly and Raisinheart, three books written at the same time and featuring the same characters, in wildly different settings. In Zombie Nights, Jimmy Kruzel is first introduced as a gambling kingpin, owner of the riverboat casino Jimmy's, apparent dispatcher of hitwomen and controller of the local liquid euphoria market. The Rick Fripperone gang of former middle-school bullies, featuring Annie Barkowicki among others, makes an appearance as the arch-enemies of a bereft and beleagured zombie in this existential resurrection thriller. In Death Ray Butterfly, Kruzel is revealed to be a mere puppet of the real criminal-in-charge, Dennis Hobbs, who prefers to remain in the background, using Kruzel as the public face of his operation. Kruzel is toyed with by the parallel-universe-skipping scientist/murderer Arab "Cricket" Jones in this comic sci-fi detective novel. In Raisinheart, the book turns to the midd

This week in Cashier World

A new Saudi ban

Bogeyman of Boredom: A Life Transparent (Reviewed)

** SPOILER ALERT ** "A Life Transparent" , by Todd Keisling, is a cautionary tale in the guise of a supernatural thriller. Beware of living a dull, cautious life, or even just being a boring person, or the boredom bogeyman might come and literally suck you out of this world, body and soul. And then, in the immortal words of one of the main characters, "you're fucked". Our protagonist is indeed a dullard, and this presents a problem for the reader. I have taken on this theme myself from time to time, and the result has always been a difficulty with readers identifying with the protagonist. In my books, the other result has been a boring book entirely, which is definitely not the case with "A Life Transparent". This book about boredom is itself never tedious. There are a number of interesting and creative features which kept me intrigued throughout. The main hook is that an ordinary person leading a pointless existence can disappear, and become on

Return of the Sexy Teenage Vampires

I know it's been a long wait of nearly one entire week since the publication of the original 'Sexy Teenage Vampires', but they're back, in the startling sequel, Return of the Sexy Teenage Vampires , free as always from Smashwords and Feedbooks, though you can also pay 99 cents to Amazon if you want to. There's a fair chance of a 'Escape from the Sexy Teenage Vampires' and 'Back to the Sexy Teenage Vampires', a la Planet of the Apes, though I doubt there will ever be a 'Beneath the Sexy Teenage Vampires'

My International Ebook Translation Strategy

I was very happy to hear from a professional translator - a Brazilian woman - who wanted to translated one of my books (Zombie Nights) into Portuguese. I agreed with two conditions. 1) she gets to keep any money from any sales of the translation and 2) all I want is periodic updates on sales numbers. We have signed a contract to that effect. She is a member of an association of translators and I told her I'd be happy to make the same official and legal deal with any translators in any languages for any of my books. Why? For one thing, I've always wanted my books translated and this seems like a good way of encouraging that. For another, I want it to be worth their while. They will effectively "own" the translated version of my books (I retain all rights to the originals of course, and my name is on the translations as the author, along with theirs as the translator) As I told her, my object in writing is readers, not money. I have the luxury of a good career

LinkedIn April Fools. People "I may know" this morning included Sherlock Holmes and Ernest Hemingway